My sweet boy,
As I sit down to write this letter to you I am struggling to put into words how much we love you. Our world and hearts were wrecked wide open and all because of you. You made us a family. God knew you were coming all along, we just had to be patient. We prayed for you since your angel sister/brother went to be with the Lord. Although we prayed for you and hoped to become a family, we truly had no idea what this first year would hold.
As we approach your first birthday, I hold you tighter and a little longer to listen to you breath and feel your heartbeat against mine. We used to share one beat, but just like everything else you have outgrown that need. You still breastfeed before bed and I look forward to this sacred moment in my day.
Your first year flew by, it seems like yesterday that we were stumbling through parenthood (still are), staring at you staring at us. Now you are constantly on the go and we are learning to be better parents as we chase follow along behind you.
Your joy and happiness are contagious. You are such a happy boy and always have a smile on your face. I love how you get dimples high up on your cheeks when you smile. Your belly laugh warms my soul. When you get super excited you breath fast and move even faster. You are popular with everyone around the neighborhood, they all flock to you when we are on walks or errands.
Watching you grow and learn new things each and every day has been one of the best parts of being your mom. I get to relive life and see it through your eyes, where everything is new and exciting. You love to explore and once you find something you like, you stick to it for awhile (okay forever). I am still in awe of how fast you change, it’s so hard to look back and remember when you were just a little blob of a nugget that didn’t move, babble, or react to anything we did. I know soon I will have a hard time remembering the stage you are in now, wobbling all around learning to walk or the sweet sound of your voice as you say “ba ba ba”. I truly cherish every moment with you.
Being your mom is the hardest, but most amazing things I have ever had the opportunity to do. It has brought me to me knees and raised me up higher than I’ve ever felt before. We had some rough days (especially in the beginning) and all it took from you was one little smile, or laugh, or you clapping for me to forget all the bad and remember all the amazingness you bring to our lives. I couldn’t have made it this far without your daddy, he is such a special man. You are so blessed to have him to look up to, I know he will teach you how to spread your love and joy to this big beautiful world.
One of my favorite things you brought along with you is showing me a bigger glimpse of God’s love. I understand God’s love, patience, grace, and discipline more by being your mommy than I ever did before. Most importantly, I feel the beauty of your grace for God to send Jesus to die for us how much does that mean he loves us, I don’t think I could even do that. I pray that you feel and know God’s love for all of your life.
You are a joy to us. We adore you and pray that you feel our love every second of every day. Thank you for all the laughs, tears, challenges, successes, and overall fun you have given us. We love you Tae Tae.
Love always,
Mama
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